This tune explores social awkwardness. I’ve always felt a bit clumsy when it comes to relating to my fellow human beings. An introvert by nature, I love spending time with family and friends, students and colleagues, but I also tend to find it draining. Parties and crowds are the worst–the swirl of voices, the multitudes of consciousness around me, often makes my head spin. I find myself trying to listen to a half-dozen conversations at once, besides my own, to the point where it becomes almost an out-of-body experience, as if I’m nothing more than a detached spectator listening to what that “other guy” is saying.

But here’s the thing–talk to just about anyone and they’ll say almost the same thing about themselves. I’ve heard so many people refer to themselves as “socially awkward” over the years, I’ve come to suspect it’s the default human condition, relegating the “socially confident” to the realm of a few stellar fortunates and those with sociopathic tendencies. I suppose it’s reassuring, in an “I’m okay, you’re okay” kind of way.

Musically, the song has a pretty conventional tune structure, with lots of the kind of drippy guitar layers that I love. I think I cribbed the melody from an old nursery rhyme my mother used to sing to me when I was little, but I’m not completely sure. One thing of note is the end. I was talking to my buddy Andy Watt recently, whose new album RAPID CITY kicks supreme indie-rock ass (seriously, buy it–it’s only $4!), and mentioned my songs tend to not have bridges. This one actually does. Sort of. It comes at the end. Though I guess that makes it a coda, right? In which case, a coda is like a bridge to nowhere (my favorite place to go). Either way, I like it.

LYRICS

Second Me

Going just to go, yesterday I saw you.
Had you been waiting just for me?
Talking to you, where did I go?
Pushing from the outside again.

Always the second to me, I don’t want to be
Near this talking head.
Feels so indifferent to me to be splitting myself,
To be half as strong.

Wondering where to go. What did I just say?
How could it have turned out this way?
Jerking on the strings, my mind bites my mouth
And nothing comes out but the sounds.

Always the second to me, I don’t want to be
Near my talking head.
Feels so indifferent to me to be splitting myself,
To be half as strong.

I’ll just chew on the side of this little thing we share.
It’s waiting for you to pull it away
And expose all the day
So I’ll have something to say
Besides…

To listen to this tune, click HERE. To download, right-click on the link and select “Save Link As.” For best results, apply headphones. Thanks for listening!

(Written, performed, and recorded by David Stahler Jr. All rights reserved.)